Is it not true that we say we believe and know that God is sovereign, then turn around and doubt that He knows everything about us, including the future? It isn’t funny at all, except that I am shocked almost to laughter sometimes of how I presume things. If you are anything like me, you may be dumbfounded when things of the past glare at you when you reflect back on them.
Our heart is full of deceit. Even before we sin, the propensity is there. Our study and preparation for life is not for just a one-time race that we think we are starting. It is for later on…the “moment” in the race when we feel like throwing in the towel, giving up on church, blaming God for pain and loss. The Holy Spirit nudges that will and spirit of your own and gives you the strength to keep going.
God had to save me from myself, as well as from hell. I didn’t understand this for many years. I think I do now. The more I see of His goodness, the more I see of my sinfulness. I was a slow learner, even though I accepted Christ as a child. It was the in-between years that got me. I must have thought that I could be disobedient until I got tired of it and would change my course.
So, here I am, still asking Christ to help me with my baggage…after all, it’s heavy! It gets in the way, and I am tired of it even more than other people are. I know He will help me rid of it when He knows I am one hundred percent serious. Serious is when you fall on your knees and say you know you have been stupid, accept His “disposal proposal” and move on.
“Lord? I am ready.”